3.30.2007
SOS, Or: Shrimp Onsets Scratching
The photos above cover our evening out seeing Legends! again last night. As you can see from the third photo, we sat way up high this time. Nosebleed section, even. The night was again, perfect. Almost.
What you don't see in any of the photos is me, miserably scratching away at the hives that started appearing on my body about an hour into the play.
See photo four.
Somehow, I unknowingly ingested shrimp during my feeding frenzy at the buffet. I'm usually quite careful when seafood and I are in close proximity to one another, and shrimp is my worst enemy.
David looked at me with a rather pained expression on his face, and it wasn't gas.
I looked like I'd been stung by several bees. The hives were everywhere; on my face, arms, back, legs, and chest.
The fact that we'd just found out about a chance to meet the cast after the show only added to my misery.
I simply couldn't face Linda Evans looking like a monster. I wouldn't face Krystle Carrington looking like a monster. Something had to be done.
During intermission I raced to the men's room shoving more than one slow moving senior citizen out of my way, not a polite "excuse me" escaping my lips. I figured they were probably wearing adult diapers anyway. I needed a mirror and a cold compress, fast.
Several soaked paper towels later, I could feel the itching subside, but it wasn't until the very end of the play that I felt fully recovered.
Nary a hive in sight, we met our Goddesses. David trembled with sheer delight as we spoke with Tonye Patano about the upcoming season of Weeds. We could tell you some secrets about season three, but then we'd have to kill you.
And finally, checking my face one last time in the reflection of my cell phone (the screensaver doubles as a mirror...shut up) I turned to my left and politely asked Ms. Evans if I could have the pleasure of eternally remembering our meeting with a photo.
The truth? I blurted out, "Holy Mary, Mother of Dynasty!" inches from her face.