Episode One

My name is Miso Kitty. When you read this website you may come across a story about the unusual day I had last week.

Normally there's never anything newsworthy about my life. That all changed last Thursday.

Of course everything seemed normal at first; I did my usual hiding between the loveseat cushions, I ran around the living room a few times leaping from the highest places I could climb, I played with newspaper like there was no tomorrow.

In truth, I spent the day as I spent every other day; quietly enjoying the routine of my life with nary a care in the world.

Which is why it was so astounding when late Thursday afternoon I decided to chew through a PSP power supply cord that was still plugged in to the outlet.

Luckily this doesn't end the same way the pilot I'm spoofing did...but still:

Sometimes good kitties do bad things. Sigh.

Twenty Three

Just in case you were wondering if I was one of those idiots who waited in line for over an hour for one of those 23-cent pizzas from Papa John's yesterday: Yes. Yes I was. And I was joined by a few friends: David, my boss, and her two children.

At first I thought there was no way in hell I would stand in 50 degree weather for so long for something I could just as easily order and have delivered within half an hour.

But then my boss said something that got me thinking: "This is history! It'll be fun! I've waited in line for hours just to ride a roller coaster for less than a minute!"

And once again, she was right. It was fun. It was part of something that we Clevelanders will never forget. And you know what? It was the best damn pizza I've had in ages.

The whole "cheap eats" thing got me thinking at work today.

I can be a thrifty mofo when I need to be. I constantly nag David to turn off lights when he leaves a room, turn off the television if he's not watching (he adores "background noise"), or to shut down the laptop when he's done checking his baseball, basketball, whatever-ball-season-it-is scores online.

I'm reminded of a story from my childhood. Don't roll your eyes at me, this is actually cute.

My Dad taught us a lesson as kids, we went an entire month without using electricity. No lights at night, no television at all, kerosene lamps and candles surrounding us at dinner time.

The total electric bill for that month of conservation was $6.00. Six bucks for a family of six. We each averaged about three cents of electrical usage a day.

I remember staring at that statement in bewilderment.

And then I felt a rush of relief as I realized that for the first time in thirty days it would be OK to poop with the bathroom light on.

A Fading Grace

I've noticed two odd and irritating imperfections about myself over the past month or so; I seem to be forgetting small, yet nonetheless important tasks at work, and I've become quite the klutz at home.

I chalk the forgetfulness up to trying to squeeze too many tasks into my allotted work schedule (and not writing down important details...I love a good 'to do' list); however the klutzy behavior remains unexplained.

I wouldn't be so irritated about the occasional falter if I hadn't already gone through a phase of this sort of thing in my twenties. I hated it then, worked to eliminate it, and until recently, did so successfully.

I take pride in being able to maneuver around an unbelievably affectionate Miso Kitty while balancing dinner in both hands. I can climb the stairs to my third floor apartment with three loads of laundry under my arms, the mail perched on top, keys dangling from my fingertips, all the while keeping a steady pace and leaping around anything in my way. (My neighbors have children and those children have carelessly cared for toys, enough said.)

But lately, it's all...falling up the stairs. Or tripping over slightly misplaced runners haphazardly placed near the front door. Or reaching for a two-for-one bottle of Febreze on a store shelf and watching every other package except the one I grabbed fall to the floor. (Sorry, super sweet customer service clerk!)

My bad.

My recent bout of the oopsies could be caused by a number of things; Lord knows I have a ton of crap on my mind and a good therapy session certainly couldn't hurt.

It's frustrating having space such as this to vent, yet not be able to do just that. So for now, I'm going shopping for a helmet and some shin guards.

If you see me around wearing this season's must-not-have accessories, don't laugh. The noise will probably startle me enough to cause a tumble.

Up the stairs, no doubt.

From Major To Minor

Someone has decided that the heart of Rock 'n Roll isn't exactly tugging at his heart strings and just might not be staying around as long as I'd like.

I understand the desire to follow your dreams and pursue personal happiness; but it saddens me to have to say goodbye, again.

The Cleanest I've Been

In preparation of my landlord and the building's maintenance man spending who knows how long in my (until recently) not too clean apartment, David and I spent the weekend giving our castle a good scrub down. The place was due for a thorough Spring cleaning anyway, I welcomed the task.

In between 'Friday Night Laramie Time' and entertaining David with yet more stories of escapades past, we managed to get a hell of a lot done.

Residing in my bathroom was, what I thought, a small clog in the tub which wouldn't go away. One visit from the maintenance man and one accidentally broken pipe turned today into a day of welding and bedroom wall cutting. You know, to make room for the new pipes.

I cleaned my apartment to watch it get dirty.

When I got home from work, I expected to find the bathroom and bedroom covered in dust, plaster, and/or greasy tools; another mess I just don't have the strength to deal with.

I looked around to find everything perfect and in working order, and not a sign of debris anywhere. There are still a few things I'd like taken care of, but I'm happy to not have to enter the empty apartment across the hall so I can shower.

Let us not forget: as much as I like a good adventure, I'm not a fan of having my familiar routine interrupted.

It feels good now that all the unwanted, unnecessary items have been tossed out and the repairing has been dealt with.

Oh, and the apartment looks good too.

Sanity Faire

You know, there are those days where I firmly believe I'm onto something when I feel a bit unbalanced upstairs.

And then a walk to the store can make those thoughts vanish into thin air.

Especially after being approached by a very large, very young, very white male who introduces himself as a very famous, very tattooed, very deceased black rapper.

He offered me a rap, I politely declined.

Sanity? Still in check.

Friday, I'm In Love

I know it's Thursday. Below are some photos that someone took during our past two Friday night outings.